Psychology is definitely one of the most impressive achievements of our era. These days psychology is everywhere. The very meaning of ‘psyche’ in the popular culture no longer has any meaning unless associated with the facts and theories provided by psychological science. Some love psychology; some loathe it; great many make a living out of it. Some take it as a marvelous feat of the human race on par with the space conquest and Palm Treo telephones, and some think of it as an ugly byproduct of the industrialization funded by the government in an effort to better control the masses. But regardless of the stance we take, one thing is obvious: psychology, as we see it today, provides, at least in some cases, a means to understand the typical human behavior and the factors that it is influenced by.

The most important question therefore is: once we’ve understood it, what do we do with it? How does knowing psychology influence our behavior? The way I see it, the elaborate psychological knowledge we’ve gained is used largely for two things: to manipulate, and to find excuses.

The psychology of manipulation (I shall call it psychoinfluentics) is the money-bringing part of psychology. It has been sponsored by both governments and businesses, because both governments and businesses want people to behave in a certain way. Traditionally, it has been achieved by brutal force and disinformation. The wonder of psychoinfluentics that sets it apart from those earlier means, is that the object of manipulation can now be made not only to obey, but to actually want to conform. Not having to deal with rebellion saves so much headache to the manipulators that it comes as no surprise that they are willing to pay for it generously.

I don’t think I will be very wrong if I say that the greatest majority of people who receive money for their psychology-related services are actually the practitioners of psychoinfluentics. From HR consultants and campaign planners to school psychologists and marriage counselors, they all share essentially the same ultimate goal: to make people behave in a certain way and feel good about it. I cannot think of any paid practical or research activity in modern psychology that is not being funded (perhaps indirectly) by someone who wants to influence people’s behavior in some way.

Of course psychoinfluentics is not only used by professionals. The popular psychology books and magazine columns feed on the desire of laypeople to manipulate everyone around them. How do I make my ____ to behave differently? – this is the most common format of the initial question people ask a psychologist sitting next to them on the airplane. The urge to manipulate is so common and powerful that in some cases it has gone beyond any common sense. Take the phenomenon of the fake smile, for instance. The fake smile is performed in order to make the receiver feel good; but the act of faking a smile makes the giver feel bad. The receiver then senses the discrepancy and becomes irritated; meanwhile, he sends the fake smile back to the giver, and the whole sequence ends with two smiling people silently cursing at each other. The failure of the maneuver is quite obvious; yet, in their uncontrollable desire to manipulate, people continue to fake smiles.

The other big part of psychology, that I shall call psychoexplanology, comes into play when manipulation fails or is not an option – most commonly when people are trying to deal with themselves instead of others. The motto of psychoexplanology is: “This Is Only Human”, and the ultimate goal of its practitioners is to maintain the status quo and feel good about it. No longer needs one to take the blame for the behavior he doesn’t want to change, as he is now armed with a set of excuses good for almost all circumstances of life. Whether it is because he has certain temperament, or is an introvert, or because he was dumped by his girlfriend in the second grade, or because his father didn’t want him, or because his grandma had suffered a nervous breakdown when she was sixteen, is to be determined in each case individually. But the conclusion is always the same: any person in this situation would behave and feel the same way; it is only human; it is only natural. Ooff, what a relief. (Incidentally, psychiatry comes into this picture as a kind of heavy artillery. If the “introvert” talks are not convincing anymore, the missile squads of bipolar psychosis or schizophrenia start showing up on the horizon.)

It is sad that the use of the power of psychology is largely restricted to the practices of psychoexplanology and psychoinfluentics, because I think they totally miss the point. Nietzsche in his “Thus Spake Zarathustra” said “Man is something that shall be overcome”. In exactly the same way, psychology is something that shall be transcended and left behind. It is permissible for the ignorant to behave in accordance with the laws of psychology. But once you have the knowledge of your psychology, you can no longer afford to obey it!

Once you know it, leave it. Un-psychologize. This is the whole point.